Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Disclosure

Well, some big decisions have been brewing lately. As of right now, no one in our life knows about my daughter's HIV. As a foster parent, it was not my right to inform anyone of this. I did tell my parents, my friend and daughter's godmother, and a friend and her husband who will be listed as guardians in my will. That's it. No one else knows this. I really thought I wanted to wait until my daughter was old enough to make that decision on her own and allow her to be the one to decide when or who to "tell." BUT, as I read more from other parents having gone through, or in the midst of, this same situation, the more I think it needs to not be a secret. I want my daughter to know she is loved and appreciated for who she is, regardless. I don't want her to grow up not knowing if she would still have friends if they "knew." I don't want her to think there is anything wrong with her, who she is, because there isn't. So, when Make a Wish happens, and sends out letters for support, I will allow them to use her name and photo. I will allow them to send letters out in our community. I will allow them to help "get the word out" so that it's not just me making a big announcement. I feel a sense of calm, of peace, and even relief. I talked with my daughter, and she gave me a huge hug. A look of relief on her face. How much pressure was she already under with this "secret?" Now she won't have to be...

1 comment:

Julie said...

I just found your blog from your comment on mine- thanks! I have often thought about taking a child with HIV for the same reasons you have your daughter- but for now- my plate is full. I am encouraged by you and hope you and your girl come up with a wonderful wish! So glad to hear she is doing so well. I will keep stopping by! :)